i always fear that i have this same problem. i think it's mostly PR. but the contrary is being a busybody! i don't want that either!
--mkb Thu Mar 6 16:37:31 2008
Granted I'm not really qualified to judge seeing as you keep avoiding actually meeting me, but I do the same thing. (There are so many excellent stories to tell and to hear!) Hmmm, but perhaps this is why you're avoiding meeting me. In which case then I'd have to say that yes it is in fact an issue.
But seriously, in my case at least, I don't think it is. And even if it were, I have to agree that therapy would encourage it, not cure it.
--Rhys Thu Mar 6 21:07:09 2008
I haven't been around you in awhile, but honestly, I think the problem might be with the people criticizing you. You know, the whole people who critique art or something like that are commenting on themselves more than on the piece of art. In other words, they're probably saying, "You're not talking about me enough."
I view an experience I had in the past as a similar situation. I was having a conversation with some people many years argue when, to make a point, I brought up a story of my own. It's a little blurry now, but I think it had something to do with a girl complaining about there not being any good men out there, me saying something about the good men being shy or insinuating that I'm a good man and am shy or something then said girl made some kind of retort. . .either which way, it was something of the classic shy person story not having a girl, the girl complaining to the shy guy who would be a good chum and the irony of the good guy not creating that sexual charge or anything. Either which way, when I brought up the story, the people I was conversing with immediately saw it as me thinking I had a problem with the situation. . .when I was just trying to make a point with the story.
--The_Lex Fri Mar 7 11:25:28 2008
To be fair, if that is the case, it might have more to do with the time the person making the criticism is going through, as opposed to that person as a whole.
--Kirk Fri Mar 7 13:18:26 2008
I don't know who you're talking about. . .I'm just commenting on the situation you presented.
--The_Lex Fri Mar 7 13:31:24 2008
Sure! I'm just kind of defending these anonymous folks in particular, as well as following my general principle of benefit of the doubt.
Probably I hear this more from/when people going through very difficult times, and it represents a feeling that I'm putting my own happy-go-lucky self in front of their troubles. Some of that is a reflection of how I deal with my own troubles; in general I want to muddle through on my own, and not dwell and get sympathy.
--Kirk Fri Mar 7 13:47:49 2008
The situation sounds a little like when I lost a friend last year. They accused me of acting like an unsympathetic parent or something because I kept giving them unwanted advice on researching careers and going after a career rather than pretty much wallowing in their situation and showing them sympathy. Different situation but sounds like similar "faults," not showing sympathy to someone that perceives themselves in a sour situation and wants to wallow in it.
I'm not much of a wallower, but I can also get stuck while trying to fix something because I can't think of a solution. If I wallowed a little, though, I might come up with a situation or stumble onto something. I probably should wallow a little more here and there.
--The_Lex Fri Mar 7 14:08:38 2008
I agree with Mr. Lex's assessment, really. "You're self-absorbed" = "Talk about me! Me! MEEEE!"
But then, I've been accused of being self-absorbed as well.
--Cordelia Sat Mar 8 10:30:43 2008
It's true that you talk about yourself a lot, which is a result of thinking about yourself a lot. Which is not a bad thing: "Know Thyself."
Being introspective as you are is a great tool. I think you know more about your own faults than most people.
Not that you particularly need it, but I think that psychotherapy would work well for you since you are able to talk about yourself, and you process a lot of your thoughts verbally.
--Mr. Ibis Mon Mar 17 09:46:35 2008
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