Why Am I A Spinster?

2019.05.03
In 1889 Tit-Bits [sic... presumably the 19th Century "tidbits"] magazine ran a contest for the best answers to "Why Am I A Spinster?"
BECAUSE matrimony is like an electric battery, when you once join hands you can't let go, however much it hurts; and, as when embarked on a toboggan slide, you must go to the bitter end, however much it bumps.
Miss LAURA BAX, Pelham Road, Wood Green, London, N.
BECAUSE I have other professions open to me in which the hours are shorter, the work more agreeable, and the pay possibly better.
Miss FLORENCE WATTS, High Street, Fulham, S.W.
BECAUSE (like a piece of rare china) I am breakable, and mendable, but difficult to match.
Miss S. A. ROBERTS, The Poplars, Ocker Hill, Topton, Staff.
BECAUSE I do not care to enlarge my menagerie of pets, and I find the animal man less docile than a dog, less affectionate than a cat, and less amusing than a monkey.
Miss SPARROW, Manor Place, Paddington, W.
--Unearthed via Dr Bob Nicholson - that thread has more interesting stuff. (via)
Just watched Hitchcock's Vertigo - maybe the first film to use computer graphics, albeit in a mechanical kind of way!