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People are such goofy essentialists that they just can't believe that something has good parts and bad parts especially if it's something they like or feel loyal to.

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"To become wise you must learn to listen to the wild dogs barking in your cellar."

I enjoyed his book "Staring at the Sun" both for it's views on coping with mortality (the main emphasis was the symmetry of non-being preceding your birth with the time after your death) and appreciating the "ripples" and how we can live on after our death in the people we touched. Also I liked the insight the book provided into the therapeutic courses others have taken.