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Comfort (from k to r, 26 Oct 1994)

Y'know, all this got me thinking.  I think the best thing I can offer you
right now is comfort, and being comfortable, able to just relax into
things, is something that's important.  Physically, the comfort between
you and me is obvious; our instincts for touch, the way we so easily slip
into eminently comfy positions, even the way I try to make my room an easy
place to be in.  (The nest chair and the pseudo-Art Deco...)  Mentally, the
gentle conversation, the occasional jump into the high-brow stuff, the
way you've started to use my "S'ok" in talk sessions... :-)  Spiritually,
well, how uncomfortable can you be when you've shared the Atomic Fire
Ball (r) metaphor of life?  Emotionally, this is the one I have to work
the hardest at.  I think I usually succeed- no silly games, no demands
for eternal love and devotion- but still, it's not always easy.  Sitting
in a room with 3 other people who have feelings for you demands that
epochs of evolution-driven jealousy be put down by gentleness alone.
(Not seeing you at all for weeks at a time can't help that either.  I
wonder if I should hang out more uphill?)
				Anyway.  This e-mail is just my
				latest theory, among many, but I
				think it's a good one.
					Let me know.

ps I'm not sure if I made it clear why I started talking about the group last night- it was because I suddenly thought that my
hair looked like Luke Skywalker's, in the first movie.  Oh, nevermind :-)

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This is the start of a revival of things between me and her at the start of our Junior years. Maybe things were easier since we could both get single rooms.

What's kind of odd about this whole time is I start up another romance with a Russian Chick. As great a time as I had with her, it was always in the shadow of my feelings for R. And the Russian Chick had another relationship as well...I enjoyed her company during the week but she went with him (not a student) nearly every weekend. And that relationship barely shows up in this e-mail.

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