February 21, 2001
I discovered this brilliant invention. They're called Rollens and they're absolutely brilliant. They're a curved piece of UV sunglass-shape plastic. They stick to your head by themselves (based on their curve), they can fit under prescription glasses, they rollup into their little cardboard sleeve and can be stored anywhere. Such a good idea. Jill from work gave me the pair they gave her since they had to dilate her eyes. You look a little cyborgy when you wear them (and freaky when you wear them underneath your glasses) so it's best to wear when you don't care what you look like. So my pair's going to live in my car for when I can't find my beloved clip-ons.

Anxiety of the Moment
Despite the wonder of these sunglasses, I feel a little down. I'm reading Prozac Highway, a very realistic story about a performance artist struggling with depression, connecting with a support group e-mailing list. Sometimes between my anxiety attacks and just feeling blue (and reading about it sets up some sympathetic vibrations I imagine) I wonder if I have some minor level of mental illness. Very minor, and I'm able to use rationality as a kind of med. Sometimes I think I'd like to talk to some kind of psychiatrist, not because I really think I need the help, I just need someone to say "yeah, you do have a touch of it (whatever condition 'it' is), but you're coping ok." Someone who will be impressed with my mortality guide as a form of coping.

I guess today had a couple of weird things.