July 14, 2018

"Remember, the end is nearer."
--Army Man #2
BRIDE: (QUIETLY, TEARFUL) Ladies and gentleman... I'm afraid there won't be a wedding after all. Because, you see... my fiance has... has died.
HECKLER FROM BACK PEW: Louder!
BRIDE (LOUDER, ALMOST HYSTERICAL) My fiance has died!
ANOTHER HECKLER: Funnier!
--Army Man #3