that old feeling

2001.09.14
Aw, man. I was worried this whole terrorist thing wasn't really sinking in. And maybe it hasn't, but my old neuroses seem to be giving me another fling. An everpresent twist in the gut, but mostly I find proof in the stirring of the bowels. (Yeah, yeah, you don't want to know the details...funny how it's so hard to find language for it.)

Mostly I'm afraid of future attacks. A nuke or something biological. I almost feel as if I'm living too close to Boston for my own comfort. I almost want to become a survivalist. I don't want the nation to have revenge, I want us to have safety. Any pro-strong-cryptography leanings I ever had are now shot to hell. So few human rights seem to compare to the right just to go on living. And, as shallow as it sounds, with a certain quality of life. Food and good plumbing and medical care at the very least.

I got the same thing before Y2K, and to a lesser extent when I started thinking that some kind of deliberate EMF jolt could throw us into a stoneage, and then again in my early-2000 "mortality crisis". It's always based on some kind real possible threat, but it's not any kind of helpful reaction.

Ay, maybe I'll read my Mortality Guide. Doesn't cover that whole 'quality of life' thing, but you know.

Incidentally, that Nostradamus Prophecy 'predicting' the WTC event is a complete fabrication.


Quote of the Moment
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts.
Bertrand Russell, a quote from the Mortality Guide, never seemed more apt.

Link of the Moment
Something a little hopeful about New York City: forgotten NY. Kind of explores some of the old archaeological features of the place. I liked the special on "Arches and Bridges of Central Park".