March 14, 2020

The real world might not be so bad. But I do hate myself.

It's your heart that perceives reality as being ugly and painful.

How you see reality, how you interpret it...The slightest changes in those leads to huge changes in your heart.

There are as many truths as there are people.

But there's only one truth for you. Built from a myopic worldview using information altered to protect yourself... It's a contrived truth.

A worldview that one person can hold in their head don't amount to much.

But people can only measure things based on their own little yardstick.

People try to see the world using only truths that have been handed to them.

Sunny days are cheerful.

Rainy days are depressing.

You start to assume that's the case because others tell you so.

But fun things can also happen on rainy days.

A change in how one small detail is interpreted can transform everything. The truth within each of us is a fragile thing.

That's pretty much all that human truth amounts to. That's what drives us to seek out a deeper truth.

Neon Genesis Evangelion
Finished the series Friday night. I was looking to find a transcription to save myself the typing which I found here but I think the line that really grabbed me was better given in the Netflix subtitles which I retyped above: Toji's "A worldview that one person can hold in their head don't amount to much." (Netflix subtitles by Dan Kanemitsu and David Fleming.)

The part I quoted is what resonated for me - the nature of objective reality and perception, though it also leads to a lesson for the main character Shinji, that he doesn't have to hate himself, and that he has a right to be here - I think that is closer to the heart of why this series meant so much for so many.

I watched the series with subtitles, which I guess is "more pure", but I dunno - there were sequences that were words flashing on screen with spoken text, and other times where there were non-animated or otherwise non-narrative images with narration by characters, and I think the difference in feeling in reading everything might not be worth what you get from the initial voice acting... but maybe the translation was better? Not sure.
A worldview that one person can hold in their head don't amount to much.
Toji, Neon Genesis Evangelion

socially distant in the streets, emotionally distant in the sheets