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(Man that gave me a rush. Reminds me of how I love songs that sing about how "it's all gone wrong")

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me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I'M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

Here's our jingle for Goldfish
Yes, baked and not fried Goldfish
The wholesome snack
That smiles back
Until you bite their heads off

See the fishes swimming -
Oh look, the pretzels winning!
Didn't that make you feel good about Goldfish?

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it's not "am I good enough to do it?", it's "do I like it enough to be bad at it?"

Heh, I guess there's also "but do I like it enough to keep working at it so I'm not as bad at instead of letting my ego tell me to not risk trying and failing vs not really trying and accepting whatever I can cruise into with natural beginner's luck.

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I'm worried for some 80s/90s kids the real "Time Enough At Last" will be like, retiring and having time and money but lack of reflexes and maybe interest in video games. I am grateful we have neighbors like Canada and Mexico and not Russia.
(Hmm, I guess for Mexico the inverse of that statement is historically less true.)

Anyway. Any plan for the ultimate Twosday of our lives? I can't think of much besides have two servings of dessert and saying "deuces" for goodbye a lot.

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Again, the really insulting thing is how the Russians and their buddies aren't even trying very hard in the false flag chicanery. here the DPR shows a guy who got his leg blown off by a Ukrainian artillery strike. Except he must be REALLY unlucky, because he already had a prosthesis on that leg..

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For a long time I've been wanting to get a MAME-ish Arcade retro setup going - anything I could use an analog control with (interested in Food Fight and Time Pilot '84)

In theory I'm embarrassed for choice, OpenEmu on Mac RetroPi, Xbox Series X dev license, etc. OpenEmu seemed like the obvious solution, but weirdly I couldn't get my USB Xbox 360 controller to work with it. But, finally, I figured out I could pair my PS4 controller to it, and OpenEMU seemed more comfortable with that.

Ugh, I take it back - I guess the control is still analog :-(

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via b3ta Did my usual 4-hour weekend facetime w/ my superniece Cora. Last week we started in with "ScratchJr", a beginner's programming kit that runs on tablets and I think phones and stuff, and this week she showed me some cool little scenes she did. She hasn't really gotten into the programming part yet (mostly she just has characters walk right for a bit) but she's doing some creative stuff with it!

It was interesting seeing her visibly soak in my praise for what she'd done. I need to find that balance of praising her legitimately cool things done so far with places where I'd like to see her push into with the tool-kit. How to get to "That's so cool, and..." and not "That's so cool, but".

I've been thinking lately about my relative emotional flatness. On a semi-tangent, one friend mentioned I was "mild-mannered" and while I appreciate the Clark Kent reference, it did make me wonder how I come across. Sometimes it gets on Melissa's nerves, or makes her worried, because I really am against letting emotions snowball so they start taking on a life of their own - when they become self-sustaining and you lose that connection with happenings in the outside world, it feels like they lack accountability, somehow, subject mostly to their own sometimes opaque logic.

At its worst, I worry I basically prefer to have two emotions, at varying degrees of intensity: satisfaction (I like this/love this/am proud of this) and annoyance (I would prefer this was otherwise.)

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Ugh, couldn't embed it but this video on renovations for my alma mater Euclid High School was quite the trip down memory lane. Impressed at how many good programs they had. I didn't do any Votech, and missed out on doing any arts except band (and some drama) but it seems like they were doing a lot of great stuff, and were keeping a high quality college-prep/AP program.

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A microphone on Mars is great, but if, for a fee, Nasa made it possible for people to blast their favorite beat on the planet, via a loudspeaker , it could pay for the entire mission.

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Everything happens so much

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They say "Life is just one damn thing after another," is a gross understatement. The damn things overlap.

The grass is greener where you water it.

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Programming is just saying "I have a meeting in an hour so better not start on this yet" to yourself until you die.

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Shame is really toxic. There is no positive byproduct of shame. It's just stewing in a toxic, hideous feeling of low self-worth and self-loathing.

Watched the Mr. Rogers documentary last night, very misty.

Sort of tangentially related, in the sense of appreciation of the world and the particular kind of mindfulness and attention he cultivated: the medium-thick layer of snow, bonded with a bit of ice, was immensely satisfying to brush off the car this morning, sliding off in gratifyingly large hunk sheets.

Also I'd love to see more of his ("Old Friends...New Friends") 1978 series (20 episodes) targeted at grown-ups. Had no idea such a thing existed.

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The Three Rhetorical Tricks That Bind Trump to his Base
Hmm. There's this idea in the Scot Adams crew that Trump is a "master persuader" and "playing 4 dimensional chess". That's only partially true - he's not good at persuading people in general, but he gets more and more loyalty from his base, and he has excellent instincts for playing a room (probably honed during his WWE wrasslin' + Vince McMahon shaving days) as long as it is supportive people - and then by being utterly willing to ignore standards of decency and respectful conversation. Or conversation, for that matter, from him the sh*t only rolls downhill (with Sean Hannity and Fox News carrying the buckets up and getting him all hot and bothered.) Apple Life Hacks from Gruber's twitter: on macOS you can make a sticky "note" appear above all other windows all the time (Window Float on Top) and on iOS you can force touch the typing keyboard to make it into a touchpad that zips the cursor around the typing area

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The annual twitter tradition continues.

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Teens are waking up to this 1984 bullshit.

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Pfizer, pocketing a big tax cut from Trump, will end investment in Alzheimer's and Parkinson's research Hey that great tax cut and late stage capitalism is real great for healthcare huh. Yay Trump! All those poor dumb bastards who voted to drain the swamp. Genius!

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Doing some light coding, watching an episode of Girls, drinking Amaretto underneath a little whipped cream from a spray bottle. I feel like a zen master of soothing distraction. Super cute Calvin and Hobbes-esque Star Wars 7 comics
A Farewell to Books! The one box with M.C. Esher Popups is claimed, I have a labeling system such that if anyone seems a must have in there they can put in a request over the next few days... I of course feel a little guilty about book purges, as is natural, but I think it's for the best. Having 2 tall shelves of stuff I really love is terrific. (Basically, I realize it's akin to my music collection; in iTunes only 3 stars and up get onto my device, but here the cut off for physical presence is 4.)

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You know, just because I didn't like that ridiculous comedy you did with Goldie Hawn did not mean I did not love you. That's what you always do. You confuse love for admiration.

I don't read Scripture and cling to no life precepts, except perhaps to Walter Cronkite's rules for old men, which he did not deliver over the air: Never trust a fart. Never pass up a drink. Never ignore an erection.

Interesting that it ends talking about still finding companionship via OKC on the like, an unexpected bit of connection between him as author and me as soon-to-be-40 reader.

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This bit by Ricky Gervais on "Extras" (@ 2:30 or so) makes me laugh. It's such a human thing to do.

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The name of the anti-gay governor of Idaho is Butch Otter. I repeat: The name of the anti-gay governor of Idaho is Butch Otter. #forrealz

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FUN THOUGHT EXPERIMENT -- Answer in your head quickly, don't over-think, then check below...
You have a meeting scheduled for Wednesday. The organizer then tells you "We're got to move the meeting forward by two days"
When is the meeting?





I got this from the last few minutes of http://onpoint.wbur.org/2014/02/20/time-wrapped-experience -- according to them, the idea is if you say "Monday", you probably conceptualize yourself as fixed, and time and events coming toward you. If you say "Friday", you see time and events are set, and you see as traveling toward them.

I'm a strong "Friday" myself.

The other interesting thing from the episode is how people some people (with a touch of synesthesia, perhaps) visualize a calendar year; apparently other people also see it as an oval or circle, and counter-clockwise is somewhat more common than clockwise. (Again this is from the end of the episode, from 40:50 til the end is really worth listening to)

Anyway, I've always had that mental image of a year as a circle... I always assumed it came from a puzzle or something I had as a kid, but now I wonder...

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You know what they say the modern version of Pascal's Wager is? Sucking up to as many Transhumanists as possible, just in case one of them turns into God.

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Interesting. Wii U has a "Dr Luigi" game. Still no 4 player mode, though :-(
nyc

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The older you get the less time you spend in hell

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A week from tomorrow I'll be as old as my dad was when he died. Trying to figure how to commemorate...
--via Boingboing who points out its Powerhouse's 75th Anniversary! Love that song.

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http://gizmodo.com/5886574/its-time-to-exterminate-the-mouse hated this article. Is Gesture based computing that great? For me, its mostly a chance to accidentally do many things.

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http://sincerelyhana.com/projects/switcheroo Wow. Having (mostly straight? Dunno.) couples swap clothes and redo the shot is weirdly compelling.

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http://kirkdev.blogspot.com/2012/02/death-of-mouse-film-at-11.html Death of Mouse, Film at 11, my response to that dumb Gizmodo article.
--Dan Lance does a lot of these "high school summaries -- like a slower-paced version of Zero Puncuation for all those books you had to read in high school.

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Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.

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http://fourfour.typepad.com/fourfour/2011/02/judge-judy-gifs.html - many Judge Judy Gifs

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Mamihlapinatapai
blurble - source - built with processing

My entry to Klik of the Month Klub #32 it's a 2 hour game based on something I saw at openprocessing.org - http://www.openprocessing.org/visuals/?visualID=6417.

Not my greatest game, but I like the look and idea of it.

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New England has its own mutant form of bowling, "candlepin". Imagine bocci as played by retarded pilgrims and you pretty much have it.

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(That's with me as the special needs pilgrim of course. Shoulda gone for the bumpers!)

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Yo mama like a hardware store..."
"Overpriced and always closed on Sunday?

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"So what should we do tonight? Watch Lost? Read stuff?"
"...watch you scratch yourself?"
"...or watch me scratch myself! Ooh, baby, I got an itch I could scratch ALL night long"
"Ooh...."
"...Oh yeah... I think it may be some kind of rash, or maybe an infection..."
"...ooh, stop. No really. Stop."

--So nearly every Nintendo game that had the composer Totaka working on staff has this little tune hidden somewhere in the game... this video goes into some of the details. (There's a Part 2 that finds it in a few more games and then Part 3 finally finds it in Luigi's Mansion.)

It's charming but in its own way a little creepy, like there's some kind of conspiracy, or some hidden meaning in the song beyond a cute little signature.

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"A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on."

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"In this modern age video games and TV get us to a trance state that used to be the domain of religion. That Pac-Man CE I played this morning was a prayer."

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Went to pay lest respects at Circuit City today, felt more like a vulture. Many of the deals weren't. Got a UPS and a game.

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If we weren't so used to them, steering wheels on cars would seem very strange, like a boat's wheel run amuck. They are effective, though. Anyone catch the lunar eclipse last night? I only saw a bit of it on its way out. It's cool how you can suddenly kind of get a better model of the solar system in your head, mentally lining up the sun, earth, and moon, and internalize the whole clockwork wonder of it all.

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Reading of the Moment

It was Homaira and me against the world. And I'll tell you this, Amir jan: In the end, the world always wins. That's just the way of things.

Just read that, a good read. Tough to get through; not so much because of the infamous rape scene, but because of how the main character fails to stand up for his friend, and then in his shame rejects his friend's absolute loyalty.

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Article of the Moment
I liked hearing about this guy and his goats; "My three goats won't stop jeering me, and I love them for it."

Do you think politicians ever change each other's mind, like with debate on the house floor? Does a convincing argument even matter at determining the outcome of votes, or is the real action in all the party-wrangling and poll analysis and the arguments are just good for sound clips on the evening news?

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Link of the Moment
Potentially useful link: GetHuman.com... how to talk to a real live person as quickly as possible, for a big array of companies. (via Sarah, who wishes Dylan was on that list.)

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Vacation Photos of the Moment
So on my first day in Florida, Felisdemens and I went to The Morikami museum and gardens. I've been thinking...I've been disappointed by food a lot lately. Especially in DC. The only meal that made me think "hey this is really pretty good" was a burrito from Baja Fresh, which was only a little worse than the great stuff at Boca Grande, and Fuddruckers at Dulles airport, which was really fantastic for some reason....good beef, some fresh condiments you pick out yourself, lettuce tomato all that, toasted buns, and really good fries. It was a great end to that week.

Also loved Fuddruckers. Especially when you can get "Mother Fuddrucker's Mustard".

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Movie Quote of the Moment

"What's 'God'?"
"You know when you really want something, you close your eyes and wish for it really hard? God is the guy that ignores you."

Not bad! A bit long and hamfisted at times, but a twist on the Utopia/Dystopia idea I hadn't seen before.

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Interview Quotes of the Moment

Sometimes I think we're on this world for three reasons: to be useful, to tell each other stories and to collect stuff.

I also like the idea that

The curse of cyberspace is that everything we want to preserve will get lost and everything we want to lose will be preserved.

It's a very good interview, wellworth the time, though I wonder why things like climate change and terrorism don't enter into the discussion more. So my apartment building has some coin-operated washers and dryers in the basement. They're covenient, I guess, but frustrating...like, the dryers have three settings, "WHITES AND COLORS" "STURDY PERMANENT PRESS" and "DELICATE PERMANENT PRESS" but lack the one that I really want, "AS LONG AND HOT AS POSSIBLE BECAUSE THIS DRYER IS A PIECE OF CRAP THAT ALWAYS TAKES TWO TIMES THROUGH". (To be fair, the leftmost dryer is ok. Which of course is the one that's always full of someone else's clothing.)

Music of the Moment
Making the rounds, at least 'til it gets shutdown, is The Grey Album. It's a "mashup" of the Beatle's "White Album" with rapper Jay-Z's "The Black Album" by DJ Danger Mouse. (Jay-Z purposefully released a vocals-only version of his music for remixing.) EMI is looking to remove it from the planet, and its efforts have probably increased the album's popularity tenfold. It sounds really good, actually.

Heh. Danger Mouse. That was a great cartoon.

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Article of the Moment
Yikes, almost eerily straightforward and practical advice on Having an Affair, from the New York Observer.

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Nerosis Fodder of the Moment
Could my new electric shaver be frying my brain, slowly? News of the Moment
One (in my opinion under-reported) recent news item was a plane crash in Iran that killed 302 members of Iran's elite Revolutionary Guards. Between that and the Pakistan Air Force chief dying in a plane crash, I bet the Arab rumor mill is bustling. Of course in the former case, they do blame the USA, the embargo we placed on them after they took over our embassy in 1979 preventing them from getting new planes and parts. (But you know...is it reasonable for them to reject the West and its values and still want our airplanes?)

But you know, that's not the reason I'm posting this. Mostly, I'm just greatly amused by the phrase "Iran's elite Revolutionary Guards"--which brings to mind one of my favorite GI Joes, COBRA's elite Crimson Guards! Man, they were so cool. The writeup is from Mike's G.I. Joe Page...that page's "Forgotten Figures" and "Guest Section" are good reads in a nostalgic way...even though Transformers were more my thing, I had my share of Joes. That site is pretty hard core though... "The 93 version, with yellow pants, was a horrible revision so avoid this one at all costs", that kind of thing. Plus, these guys sound like they still play with them, or maybe they just make those dioramas or something. (And of course, they're way too cool to like "Snakeyes"...remember him, the mute ninja dude?)

I guess Iraq's "Elite Republican Guard" is just about as bad.

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Onion of the Moment

"The Euclid fire appears to be an isolated incident unrelated to terrorism," Bush said. "But next time, we might not be so lucky. That is why we, as a nation, must do everything we can to drive out Saddam Hussein and his ilk. By confronting terrorism head-on, we can once again live in a nation where we don't jump every time a dryer buzzer goes off."

Meaning "Local" to Euclid, Ohio baby! Right outside of Cleveland. I'm practically famous.

Also, the latest AV Club has an interview with Dave Attell (from Insomniac...) I was disillusioned to find out they film in one city over the course of several nights, not just one night into the wee hours. Still, I love that show, just wandering around and drinking and seeing what people do at night.

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Quote of the Moment

90% of everything is crap. [...] Except crap. 100% of crap is crap.

Quote and Link of the Moment

I'm not a security threat: I'm Canadian

The worker is writing this Really Interesting Weblog on his experiences. (via Ranjit)

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Nostalgia of the Moment
I never watched enough Robotech when I was a kid, (mostly I could never figure out when it was going to be on) but I always liked the look of their giant fighting machines. This reference page for the roleplaying game has a lot of cool images of the "mecha" . One of my perennially favorite office toys is a model of the Invid Trooper, I like its big claws. Oh, not too long ago Lego released a very cool Mech-like set for its "Life on Mars" theme. I think it's still available in stores, though I don't know for how long. I think it's the coolest Lego prebuilt I've ever seen, very well articulated and good looking. I discovered this brilliant invention. They're called Rollens and they're absolutely brilliant. They're a curved piece of UV sunglass-shape plastic. They stick to your head by themselves (based on their curve), they can fit under prescription glasses, they rollup into their little cardboard sleeve and can be stored anywhere. Such a good idea. Jill from work gave me the pair they gave her since they had to dilate her eyes. You look a little cyborgy when you wear them (and freaky when you wear them underneath your glasses) so it's best to wear when you don't care what you look like. So my pair's going to live in my car for when I can't find my beloved clip-ons.

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Anxiety of the Moment
Despite the wonder of these sunglasses, I feel a little down. I'm reading Prozac Highway, a very realistic story about a performance artist struggling with depression, connecting with a support group e-mailing list. Sometimes between my anxiety attacks and just feeling blue (and reading about it sets up some sympathetic vibrations I imagine) I wonder if I have some minor level of mental illness. Very minor, and I'm able to use rationality as a kind of med. Sometimes I think I'd like to talk to some kind of psychiatrist, not because I really think I need the help, I just need someone to say "yeah, you do have a touch of it (whatever condition 'it' is), but you're coping ok." Someone who will be impressed with my mortality guide as a form of coping.

I guess today had a couple of weird things.

• First I saw a copy of "Worth" magazine that talked about all this longevity technologies. The idea that there might be some new things on the horizon, but I might miss out on them, is depressing. I'm able to convince myself that mortality's ok, but it's one thing to think it (an important thing) and another to really feel it deepdown. I'm getting there though. (Sometimes it seems dangerous to to be able to cope with mortality. If I ever got really depressed, I've lost some of my instinctual dread of taking my own life. Note to loved ones: I have no such plans! Don't worry.)
• After taking the photos for the Rollens pic, comparing them to some pix from high school, I wonder if I am balding after all, and if I should do something about that. Oy. I've always had thin hair and a far back hairline, so it's hard to know for certain, but I've probably just been in some level of denial all this time.
• My computer's acting up.
• I feel like I'm not getting stuff done.
• The month is kind of slipping by. Not too bad. I have this journal and another diary journal, so I can track the time. I know what happened the first 20 days of this month! Groundhog day was a long time ago! Still, it's one thing to know that and one thing to really live it flat out.
• I'm worried about how long of this 'blog journal my 8meg Palm pilot's going to be able to hold. Which was one of the main reasons why I let myself get the dang thing!