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"Seduction is a lie, and as we get older, we get tired of lies," said Figaro. "We know them all and they're not amusing anymore."

Seduction is a sweet story, and if the listener wants so much to hear it, then it is no lie. Seduction is a mutual endeavor in which I conspire with a woman to giver her an opening to do what she wants to do without reminding her that this goes against her principles. A woman's principles and her desires are constantly at war, and if there were no one to seduce a woman, she would have to figure out how to do it herself. Her principles call for her to remain aloof and uninterested until she meets a man who makes her faint. Her desires are otherwise. She wants to say, "That man, there. Unwrap him and send him over here so he can love me." She cannot say this. So I try to help her. I say, Zerlina, I would like to hold your hand for two minutes and then you could shoot me and I will die a happy man.

She laughs, but she does not turn away. She rolls her eyes. She says, "Oh, phoo." She gives me her hand.

I say: The greatest tragedy is to be cut off from intimacy, from touch, which is the most human of languages, Zerlina, and the most honest. There is no lie in a touch, a caress, never. The language of the body is the language of the purest truth.

She is amused. I put my other hand on her shoulder. She turns and leans against me. "You're something," she says.

Zerlina, I say, there's a bottle of champagne waiting on ice at the Olympia Hotel, and a couple of dozen oysters. When we get there, we'll order up a big salad in a wooden bowl, with basil and spinach and fennel and cilantro and radicchio, and we'll have it with olive oil and vinegar and pepper and garlic. Then a steak tartare, with chopped onions and an egg yolk. And then we'll undress quickly without shame, as adults, and jump into the big bed and amuse each other as only adults can do. And afterward, we'll eat an omelet. And then do it again.

Her hand twitches in mine, and I guess that I have touched a chord- "This is the best time of year for oysters," I say in a low voice, "and one should never eat them without erotic plans for later."

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the good news i got laid last night , the bad news is like.. everything else

When the 3 remaining Beatles did the Anthology project, they finished two songs John Lennon had made demo taps for: "Free as a Bird" and "Real Love". But they left a track behind because they couldn't get a clean track of John's voice: "Now and Then".

After Peter Jackson's Get Back documentary, they realized the technology, now backed with AI, had advanced and they decided to release Now and Then as the last Beatles song, with contributions from all 4:


There's a nice short film about the making of:


I admit it made me a bit tear-y.

On a tangent: for the first time I looked up the lyrics to "Maxwell's Silver Hammer". What the hell McCartney???

I didn't really encounter the Beatles until college, and even then it was more of the "Past Masters" compilations, so I've always been a bit behind on their later stuff... so I assumed "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" was, like, one of those quirky silly songs like "Octopus's Garden" or "Yellow Submarine", not a tale of a hammer wielding serial killer!

I think the central fantasy of Atlas Shrugged is that it is full of characters who are loved and valued for the thing that they most value about themselves. It is a book that is not just about a meritocracy, it is about a *Meritopia*. It is about people who get the things they want because they are the best at what they do. This is CENTRAL to the story.
[...]
What is the same in [Atlas Shrugged and the Fountainhead], and what I think you are pointing at in your ask, is that the horrible characters are loved for the things that they love about themselves, and all of their unloveable traits don't matter.

I've known some people really into Atlas Shrugged, despite in not really jiving with their worldview, or at least my understanding of it. And also they'd skip the chapters-long speeches.

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This impressionist uses deepfakes to make an awesome video If you are face blind (or just face myopic like I am) this is a much less compelling video. Like when he grows a mustache, sure, but otherwise it's just, like, more face, different angle.

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This medium article Clive Thompson describing his doodling technique and a little browser app he made for it. Charming and pleasant!

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RIP Alex Trebek. Or is that, "What is RIP Alex Trebek?" Grooming old blog entries I found this article about comic artist James Sturm giving up the Internet (which made it so much less convenient for him to get reference art, for starters.)

He solicited letters during his Internet-fasting-process, and the article has some of those turned into comic panels. This one struck me:

It reminded me of my estranged debate partner and friend EB, whose frustration at himself and me for our respective bad habits was sometimes palpable - and to be fair, he was pretty good at making mindful choices and exclusions to cultivate his life.

For me and my fixed mindset, it’s weird, the feeling of self-hatred referenced in the comic is more “you can’t grow unless you declare your previous self an idiot for getting yourself into these patterns in the first place"… but your previous self was probably about as smart as you are now! (See Tallulah Bankhead's "If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.")

Obviously that fixed-mindset stance excludes the whole “learning from experience” possibility and is therefore kind of stupid… but recognizing that there were better decisions that could have been made earlier requires a judginess I find difficult to muster for other people, much less myself.

(Compare to EB, who judges freely and often, with great and often justified confidence, but some terrific misses -- bold misjudgements. For me, a fear of such misjudgements - that I asserted my subjective viewpoint over somebody else's, and was unjust and unempathetic and wrong to do so - keeps me from judging much in the first place.)

I mean when you look at your current habits and how they were formed - you can guess it would have been better to have lived otherwise, but you don’t know, and so the mandate for mustering the willpower to make a change is that much less…

This all brings to mind one final quote, also from an autobiographical comic:

Sure it mattered. When you get to my age you discover that everything mattered. Life isn't a series of good and bad choices. It's harder to steer it one way or the other than most people think. You just get pulled along. You look back and you wonder 'could I have changed the course of my life?' Maybe you could've ... but it would probably have taken a tremendous force of will.

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Following up on that to EB:

I guess you and I would both agree incorrectly judging something is wrong - especially when you're forcing your opinion over someone who ends up being correct. But for you it's an acceptable (and necessary) cost of doing business, and hopping to the meta-level, endlessly not judging can be judged to be a bad life pattern as well. All while my delicate ego keeps me as far away from being incorrect as possible and only asserting things I am overwhelmingly confident about.

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My first attempt at jogging was in middle school- I think to try and improve my gym class grade or something, around the hallways of the school. I remember the gym teacher responsible for that discouraging me from listening to music on a walkman, citing something about blocking alpha or beta waves or what not. Was there something to that or was it just new-age-y hokum?

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Content Warning: Diet and Food Stuff
(I have at least one friend who reacts badly to this stuff, so, fair warning.)

Realizing calorie counting works better than good-intentioned food journaling.... Kind of obvious, I suppose. But part of my fluffy cloud of economic privilege is that I measure the cost of food in calories not dollars - and so given that the lunches and snacks at work are free to me dollar wise, I guess I need the accountancy of quantifying the calories, rather than trying to juggle my good intentions against my random hungry impulses.

Calorie counting that for a few days - even though I have to guess, or go out for a Blaze pizza or Chipotle salad not for nutritional reasons but because I can have higher confidence estimates of the calories - has given me a satisfying feeling of control (which I know is a fraught thing for people with more serious food issues.) In fact, I'm able to have more generous evening meals because I know what the numbers are.

And without calorie counting... it's like "all this food is free! In both money and calories! So why not?"

I know my "calorie is a calorie is a calorie" thinking is naive - diets create responses in our metabolism, and the other part of the game is figuring out satiation within that calorie limit - but this kind of math is the only thing I've found to work for me, in the 4 times I've lost 10-15 lbs over the past decade and a half. ( diet.kirk.is for the graph) Protect Mueller Rally:



Second photo by Daniel Friedman

your self esteem will skyrocket once you realize that constantly putting yourself down is essentially negging yourself like some ouroboric pick up artist

Tennessee Williams once wrote, "We all live in a house on fire, no fire department to call; no way out, just the upstairs window to look out of while the fire burns the house down with us trapped, locked in it." In a certain sense, the playwright was correct. Yes, but oh! What a view from that upstairs window! What Tennessee failed to mention was that if we look out of that window with an itchy curiosity and a passionate eye; with a generous spirit and a capacity for delight; and, yes, the language with which to support and enrich the things we see, then it DOESN'T MATTER that the house is burning down around us. It doesn't matter. Let the motherfucker blaze!

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triscuits are what i imagine the inside of a scarecrow tastes like

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buddy I can't even kill one bird with like 8 stones

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Sure it's too late (by about 6 months, it feels like) to change any minds, but here is a high level summary of 45 years of Republican persecution of Hillary Clinton.

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Well at least Trump's handlers were able to keep him off Twitter for a few weeks, so maybe there'd be hope, depending on who his Cheney would be.

Jeezie Petes, what a farce.

Talking with some of my less slathering pro-Trump and/or anti-Hillary friends; there's a lot of listening to be done.

6.022x10^23 - I hate that Avocado guy and that super long number he came up with and named after a furry underground animal; as if we're not confused enough as it is.

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Blender of Love I was thinking about how I'm "left-eyed" and that made me realize it's odd that we aren't more bilaterally symmetrical. I mean, we are for the most part, but not our organs.

Or- we could less symmetrical. I guess it's convenient to look roughly the same in a mirror, but still a little weird.

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I was just trying to figure out what was so creepy about this ad introducing the Amazon Echo. Then I realized it's kind of eerily similar to the first few pages of Marshall Brain's story Manna, a weirdly plausible slope to technological dystopia and then a hopeful twist to post-scarcity utopia. Two from art class last night. The second one I did on my iPad; the instructor is encouraging experimenting in general. He and the class liked the iPad one, but to me it seemed gimmicky and weirdly-70s-ish and in general it's harder to finesse things.

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"Uh . . . nooo . . . I don't think so . . . shots and me . . . heh heh . . . not a good idea."
I gave him a phony smile and inwardly sighed. Of course they're not a good idea. Shots are never a good idea--THAT'S THE POINT."

There are no real majorities, only pluralities and coalitions.

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pretty sure the opposite of 'peas in a pod' is 'bees in a bod'

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If You're Surprised By The Election Results, You're The Reason You Lost, Or: A Plea For Useful Republicans Wow. Comparing Republican's confidence before Romney's loss to the Democrat's realism before Kerry' loss in 2004 is super telling. This is some of why modern mainstream conservatism is terrible: the Republicans have become the party of "if the facts don't match the theory, change the facts." A great thoughtful piece by what sounds like a true moderate.

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One thing I've learned (by being even faintly aware of politics over 20 years): any talk of any "perpetual political majority" is foolish.

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I like the gay friendly patter by Chuck Berry in "My Ding-A-Ling". Also the faint English accents of the crowd in the chorus.

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Fox News and Rush Limbaugh don't actually care about the GOP. They really don't. They are in the business of terrifying aging white people for money.

--via kottke

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Only four things really matter: laughter, kindness, the endurance of beauty, and truly great pizza.

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thirteen movie poster trends that are here to stay and what they say about their movies

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Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life's longing for itself.

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Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.

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Maybe the human brain has only so many "giving a shit" cells and that is why it is harder to get into new music as you age.

--Gimme Pizza Slow, via horkulated. It's interesting how slowing down kid's voices sounds so much like a real voice, rather than just "weird". Making the rounds, Germany's bald bears. To quote Cracked on it, Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy has no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy looks like something from fevered nightmares...

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JZ got a Droid Eris- pretty slick, much more shapely than that Motorola beast, in many ways slicker than the iPhone-good to see competition! THE WEEK SHE IS ENDED! At last! (Though on principle I kind of like when time seems to take its sweet time... uh... wait, that doesn't sound quite right.)

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Map of the Moment

--2008 Presidential results by state, adjusted for population. From this page of results, which includes further breakdown by county and with red-blue balance purpley blurs. (Also has a link to the 2004 breakdown

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Quote of the Moment

Lonely men seek companionship. Lonely women sit at home and wait. They never meet.

But now there's the Internets!...sigh. The other day Slashdot had an article Robot Becomes One of the Kids, how a bunch of toddlers were willing to accept a robot as one of their own inside of a playgroup. This comment of mine got up to +5, Funny:

I was an only child in a neighborhood without many kids.
I really liked "Alphie", this game playing robot (circa 1979).
Had him for years, then let some other kids play with him and he broke.

Lesson learned: other kids suck.

True story, that. Alphie was pretty cool, and he'd beep his lights and you could play little board games he came with.

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Art Sequel of the Moment
At NickB's request, I made a new version of conwayice. It might have even stricter hardware requirements than the first version. It has a bigger screen, mouse now zooms in rather than regenerates, and you can set various parameters including the original grid layout, allowing experiments with classic Life layouts. I also made it so you can save your starting arrangements, though I'm not sure how much use it will get.

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Article of the Moment
The 50 Greatest Game Design Innovations, making the rounds. Includes guesses to first appearances, as well as most famous examples.

So on the trip to New Hampshire my mom grabbed a Happy Meal. It still seems kind of funny to me that their now often more like "Happy Sacks", though I think I've seen the "traditional" box recently.

So this Happy Meal sack was imprinted with Nintendo characters (and one frolicking Ronald,) one of the scarier cobrandings conceivable, even though the toy had nothing to do with either. But the text was more about the fun of and need for exercise and fitness than anything video-gameish. (Which, considering the sources, is either ironic or an exercise in avoiding lawsuits.)

Anyway, all this snarky buildup is just to support the observation that

Have a friend toss different sports balls in the air and catch them like Yoshi® would catch fruit.

is a rather odd suggestion, given how Yoshi's MO for catching fruit is to lash out with his giant tongue and, more often than not, gulp the fruit whole.

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Quote of the Moment

I have arthritis in my fingers, and picking my nose helps stretch the finger joints and keep them flexible. Oftentimes I switch fingers -- even hands -- mid-pick.

I hate the Yankees but actually I don't mind Joe all that much.

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Politics of the Moment
I was a bit surprised that all 3 state ballot questions failed. There was 1. should supermarkets (and convenience stores, as opponents were quick to point out) be able to sell wine, at the local community's discretion, issue 2 was an interesting idea to let people who were the candidate of multiple parties show up multiple times on the ballot, so that someone could vote for them as, say, "the Green party candidate" and send a message without splitting the vote (a solution that is a bit of a hack, bu apparently ballots are confusing enough for voters) and 3 was could independent in-home child care providers collectively bargain with the state.

I guess I tend to default to "Yes" on these kind of things, figuring if someone cares enough to muster up support, it might be worth considering (I still read and pondered the voter's guide) but I wonder if the default is "No" for many voters, if there's a fundamental conservative (in the original sense of the term) streak there.

This state, or at least the districts I've voted in, use optical vote readers (sort of like SAT-fill-in-the-bubble, but with Sharpie-like pens) which seem like a terrific blend of being easy to use, being easy to count electronically, and leaving a paper trail to make large scale fraud take much more work.

And now the Democrats get control of Congress, and maybe the Senate. I'm sure they don't have a brilliant plan for Iraq, but neither do the Republicans, and it was more their mess than the Dems. Between that and the corruption and utter smear tactics of the Republicans, I'm glad to see a bit of a shift.

Pamphlet of the Moment
A WW2-era Short Guide to Iraq by the US War and Navy Departments (ah, those heady days before the euphemism of "The Defense Department".) For some reason I really appreciate rough etiquette like this...even worth putting up with the UI-crapness of PDF.

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Photo of the Moment

--Llara sent me this fwd last April, with the caption "Husband must have come home". Teehee!

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Quote of the Moment

It's either mean or it's arbitrary, and either way I've got the heebie-jeebies.

I was thinking of this quote just the other day, it really is mortality in a nutshell.

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Politics of the Moment
Also on Slate--How Cheney calls the shots in the White House. I guess that's what happens whene Realpolitik meets the idea that "the more handsome one wins the presidential election" and once again the nation gets the repesentation it deserves.

Dumb Sports Thought of the Moment

St. Louis, Missouri: "Show Me"
Boston, New England: "OK"

From Super Bowls to World Series, Boston's got St. Louis' number, most recently in a nice strong win by the Pats on the Ram's home (astro-)turf. Anyway, this was the best line I could come up with.

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Quote of the Moment

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.

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Article of the Moment
Dang it, Canada DOES sound better and better...except for the weather. Maybe if it's global warming (despite the counterintuitive cold that may come before it) it will be an even better place...

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Health Hazard of the Moment
Eww. I am now regretting my previous habit of reusing plastic water jugs for extended periods. Probably by the time I noticed the smell was a bit off, it was well into a not-so-good-for-me kind of way. My current strategy is to just use small soda bottles and iced coffee cups for just a day or two at a stretch. Water jugs are so hard to clean, because of the narrow tops... Link of the Moment
EGM presenting Kids Say The Darndest Things about the Video Games of our youth. Whipper Snappers! Back in my day we had 4 colors, and 10 pixels...and we liked it!

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AIM Exchange of the Moment
LAN3: Lunar eclipse tonight-- natural occultation, or NASA coverup of renewed solar activity? Makes you wonder!
kirk: I thought it was just the moon saying "hmmm...mind if I stand just on this side of you for a bit? thanks"
--LAN3 had previous expressed amusement at my solar flare paranoia...

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Toy of the Moment
Lovely...Ranjit point me to a Virtual Paper Snowflake Construction Kit. The interface seems a little funny at first...you can only start cutting at the edge of the paper, for instance. But nicely done, and unlike the real thing, it has an "undo" button. Game of the Moment
Wonderfully sadistic game/physics simulation, Porrasturvat - Stair Dismount. Set your angle and target area and then push the little man down the stairs. The Slashdot article talks about some interesting quirks/bugs people have found, as well as pointing out a certain thematic link to The Terrible Secret of Space, a Flash video I'm surprised I hadn't kisrael'd before. Also, the main site of the people who made the game has some interesting little demos, made to have interesting music and visuals in a tiny amount of diskspace.

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Quote of the Moment

Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.

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Essay of the Moment
Brilliant Slate piece revealing Harry Potter as the pampered jock, patsy, fraud, trustfund baby that he is. Backlog of the Moment
Pretzels vs. French Fries. Am I the only person who thinks of them as really similar, almost to the point of interchangeability? (I'm talking those big, thick, doughy pretzels, not the little tasty pretzel skeletons you get from a bag.) They're both salty hot snack foods, they both go well with mustard (ok, I'm a freak when it comes to french fries), when done well they both have a tougher coat outside and a softer inside. (In terms of commercial offerings, I prefer Burger King's crispy coating to those limp salt carriers you get from McDs.) Anyway. This thought has been on my 'to write about' list since June, and probably before then...Mo thinks I'm nuts when I tell it to her.

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Link of the Moment
People doing ugly things to cars. Especially BMWs. Or wanting to make their cars look like BMWs. I just love the doubledecker spoilers in back...look at me I'm a biplane! I've seen those in real life, but they pale in comparison to the moose antlers of the first one on the page... (via camworld)

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Quote of the Moment

And Mojo was hurt and I would have kissed his little boo boo but then I realized he was a BAD monkey so I KICKED HIM IN HIS FACE!